One-Liner Wednesday – It Could Be Worse

Stepping into dog poop is one of life’s greatest admonitions for ingratitude.

 

Seriously. Have you ever stayed up into the wee hours of the morning working on a tough assignment, then had to wake up for work in like forty-five minutes? You’re cranky and exhausted as you shut down your alarm. You roll out of bed and head to the shower only to discover that the pipes are dry. You call your neighbour who confirms that there’s no water in the building because of blah blah blah, which you don’t care about because you have to shower with a cup of cold water. You get past that hurdle, walk into a mist of your best perfume, and put on your powder blue suit. As you “smize” in the mirror, you notice the long white streak going down your right sleeve, something you failed to see when you sleepwalked through doing your laundry a few nights before. The new outfit you choose is wrinkly but you have absolutely no time to iron it. You gather your things, run outside, sweat pouring down your back, pondering why nobody left you an inheritance and absent-mindedly step into dog poop. Suddenly, between the expletives and the smell, everything that went before has paled in comparison to this atrocity. Perspective, people, perspective.

 

[Image via Pixabay]

 

One-Liner Wednesday is hosted by Linda G. Hill.

25 thoughts on “One-Liner Wednesday – It Could Be Worse

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  1. Urgh. There is nothing worse than treading in doggie poop. On a rainy day it is so much worse, all squishy!

    We used to live near dog poop alley in London. There must have been several owners that never picked up their dog poos on that street. I was always sooo careful on that particular road in the morning!

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  2. The only thing worse than stepping on dog poo is stepping in human poo. My mother did once.
    It was about 50 years ago when her & my dad were dating (Courting in those days). They were having a little snog in a gateway when mam realised she stood in poo. She did attempt to clean it but when she realised it wasn’t from an animal…..she kicked of her shoes and left them. Walked home barefoot!
    They’re still together

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  3. OMG! Two Poop Stories in one morning! I just read one from Sick Christine (at least I think it was her) about bird poop on a Girl Trip. Go figure! (And yes, it can always be worse; just don’t want you to have to experience it) xoxo

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